Shleeeep - 2:40 p.m.

zzzzzz

Is Mr. Oaf awake… or is he asleep? His eyes are open but nothing seems to be happening.

Teddy waves a paw in front of his eyes but Mr. Oaf doesn’t even blink.

“Maybe he’s dead,” muses Nesbitt.

“He’s definitely breathing.”

Nesbitt puts the stones away because the standard thing to do when someone dies is to put stones down their throat. We can’t explain it, it’s just the way it is…

While Mr. Oaf sleeps…”

Lets have a look at what’s going on his MIND.

Teddy dons his special white coat and puts on his special visor, a chrome dish that sits on his head. “Let’s take a look…”

The Cerebellum is the part of the brain below the back of the cerebrum where Mr. Oaf stores pictures of Jimmy Corrigan, The Smartest Kid In The Word . These images regulate balance, posture, movement, and muscle coordination, such as it is…

Corpus Callosum is a large bundle of nerve fibres that connect the left and right cerebral hemispheres. Unfortunately, the bundle is all mixed up in big tangles and knots like the wires behind the TV. All we can see at the moment are amazing pictures of far away.

The Medulla Oblongata is the lowest – and we do mean lowest - section of the brainstem (at the top end of the spinal cord); it apparently controls automatic functions including heartbeat, breathing, etc, but it doesn’t appear to be working. Luckily Teddy is a good friend of Dr. Octagon, who does house calls and recommends 10ccs of Pony Ride.

Occipital Lobe of the Cerebrum is the region at the back of each cerebral hemisphere that contains the centres of vision and reading ability (located at the back of the head). Teddy taps on Mr. Oaf’s eyeballs like someone tapping on the glass of a fish tank, but nothing is happening.

Temporal Lobe of the Cerebrum - the region at the lower side of each Mr. Oaf’s cerebral hemisphere; contains centres of hearing, memory and his wayward sense of time.

Parietal Lobe of the Cerebrum the middle lobe of each cerebral hemisphere between the frontal and occipital lobes; it contains important sensory centres dedicated to battling the Great Satan that is Eddie Maguire .

What’s The Prognosis Doctor?

“Hmmm,” says Teddy, folding his stethoscope and putting it in his pocket. “Better get the stones.”

bears in history - future bears

“This diary cracked me up, completely, perhaps the oddest diary I have ever read. I'm not sure if it's a takeoff on something or someone that I have somehow missed. Regardless, TEZNEZCO! chronicles the adventures of two bears and describe them as if they are a minority of some sort. The writing is disturbingly matter-of-fact as if it is perfectly normal to be writing about these bears as people. I like it; it's pleasantly novel" - Diaryreview

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