Monday - 11:44 a.m.

Variety Reports: “Nesbitt Heads Oscar™ Noms for Hat Tips”

Have you seen The Last Samurai? Aside from beingTom Cruise’s best film by a country mile (which is .2 miles longer than a standard city mile), it also features a huge selection of fine hats – from the helmets of the Samurai, the bowler hats of the smart city gents to the wild west style hats of Timothy Spall, this movie is a chapeau-fest! Serving as the films historical adviser was none other than TEZNEZCO!’(The Company Run By Bears™)’s own Nesbitt.

As Daily Variety reported: “Nesbitt contends Oscar buzz is hype, but accepts Edward Zwick’s thanx for his contribution to latest b.o. smash The Last Samurai Says Zwik, “The hats are all the small bear’s work. We could have been in a dreadful situation but he saved the day! This nomination is all yours!”

Latest Business Plan Unveiled

Not to be outdone by Nesbitt’s high profile, Teddy revealed TEZNEZCO!’s latest bold business venture. As fond as we are of the inverted comma, we’ve also noticed its mad proliferation throughout the internet, in print and on the tips of people’s fingers when they say things like “I was being (wiggle wiggle) ‘ironic’”. Well, with some venture capital that Teddy found in an old sock behind a bookcase, we’ve gone ahead and copyrighted the use of the “”.

We’re looking at you Sigur Ros

With an album simply called “()”, Teddy has already begun legal action against the use of the “”.

Googalized & Boogalized Lobby Bears

You’d thought you’d heard the last of the Lobby Bears saga but you’d be wrong – dead wrong. During the quiet January period we have been doing a little web research (and getting paid at home!) and found some startling new evidence that the whole Lobby Bears phenomenon is growing, not shrinking. We offer the following as evidence and recommend that if you have a moment or two free on the net, just type in Lobby Bears and follow the links.

“Its central focus, a sculptural sphere suspended above the lobby, bears nameplates from newspapers worldwide; a marquee circles it, flashing current headlines…”

“We disobeyed the sign and climbed the stairs. From the mezzanine it’s clear that the downstairs lobby bears a lot more foot traffic than it was ever meant to…”

“While the lobby bears a European aesthetic, it still maintains a clean, crisp and pristine look with colonial influences and classic details. ...”

“The bear wanders around the grounds at night and has tried to get through the hotel lobby. Bears are protected under a 70-year-old Slovak law.”

“Starting at 1pm on Monday, April 3rd, the public will be able to deliver new bears to the lobby of the 1818 Market Street Building, where a Teddy Bear Mountain…”

“Israeli Lobby Planted Phony Story About Palestinian "Celebration" AP Deliberately Ran 1991 ... laws is quite similar to forcing grizzlies, polar bears, and black…”

“UitAgenda Een Hele Kunst De Lobby Bears & Bulls In de Ban van de week Café Vondel Mediazaken De weekendprogrammering Café Vondel Het journa- listen forum…”

“Somebody on the team (no names until Haley figures it out) calling Haley's room and telling her that her license was in the lobby and she needed to… GO BEARS!!...”

“Animal lobby forces Foot Guards to look for alternative bearskins By Caroline Davies He stressed that the bearskins were from culled bears.”

“While the lobby bears a European aesthetic, it still maintains a clean, crisp and pristine look with British colonial influences and classic details.”

“He's quick to point out the lodge's luvely folk art bureau in the lobby… we carrya huge selection of moose and other plush animals, boyds bears resin and more …”

“During the construction of the Gateway Building the Bears were moved out of the old lobby of the Main Hospital to a temporary location…”

“For collectors, young-at-heart fans or as a special treat for kids, Racing Bears are a new twist on an old-fashioned collectible favorite, the ... Store Lobby…”

“March of the Teddy Bears - Kansas City 2002 - The Holiday Bears will be on display in early November through the New Year as ... Hands of Love Bear, Crown Center - inside Hyattlobby, Star In Education, Cynthia…”

Tomorrow: Teddy FAQs

We’ve promised it before and we’ve had to put it off because of time constraints and budgetary overruns, but Teddy plans to ask the Senate to ratify a new $1 billion budget to put together a selection of Teddy-related F.A.Q.s – possibly some of those “hints and tips” that other web pages have. (Mr. Oaf asks: could someone please explain why any web site would have a “hints and tips” section? Wouldn’t you just go ahead and tell your users what they need to know rather than just hinting at it? Or tipping them off to things? Ramon J. Dodd, web professional, would probably know…)

We don’t think $1 billion is enough to build the technology to make the FAQs a reality but it’s a nice idea, isn’t it? Tomorrow we unveil the new FAQs and see what that much cash can actually buy…

bears in history - future bears

“This diary cracked me up, completely, perhaps the oddest diary I have ever read. I'm not sure if it's a takeoff on something or someone that I have somehow missed. Regardless, TEZNEZCO! chronicles the adventures of two bears and describe them as if they are a minority of some sort. The writing is disturbingly matter-of-fact as if it is perfectly normal to be writing about these bears as people. I like it; it's pleasantly novel" - Diaryreview

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